Thursday, May 29, 2008

Till "DEBT" Do Them Part

I always feel sad when two people who are bestfriends will not be on good terms anymore just because of debt or "utang" in Filipino dialect. I had very bad experience with it although not with my bestfriend. The bad thing is that: those who will borrow money from me were the ones who will not even talk to me anymore! Isn't that so strange? I cannot just imagine that!

Okay, of course, each individual is different and each person has just different ways in handling their finances. There are people who do not have the means but still because of "ego", "pride", or whatever you call it would resort to borrowing money just for the sake of buying things that, honestly, they cannot afford. I am very different person. When i was in elementary till college, i can only remember having things that were neccessary. I do not have the "extras". There was even Christmas that we have nothing to eat! But i cannot remember borrowing things or getting envious because some children got new clothes, new dress, new toys. I had grew up without even a doll in my childhood days, but i am okay! I always thought that if people will only live within their means, there can never be too much problems! But when people try to be so "conscious" with how they look, when people will always recognize the things that they don't have instead of the things that they have, oh well, there goes the trouble.

Okay, let's go back to borrowing... I just learnt that my two friends Annie and Sonia who had been bestfriends for probably over 10 years had separated ways due to debt. I was stunned. Both of them are godparents to my eldest son. I feel so sad. What happened from what i heared was that Sonia borrowed money from Annie and that Sonia hadn't paid. This is really crazy and i didn't know how to patch them up as the two of them are not in good terms anymore. If i'll mention the name of the other party, obviously, the person concerned is not very comfortable. So, usually it's me that will avoid the topic. It's just strange that how can real friendship be broken by material things?

Ah, i hated debt. Honestly, i do and i hated people who have no "palabra de honor". I never had material debt in my life. And if i will have in the future, i will never forget to pay plus the interest. The thing is: when we borrow, we enjoyed the money. I remembered borrowing things before, like when i graduated from highschool, i borrowed dress and shoes from our neighbor because my parents could never buy me one! All the people that had helped me when i was in the downest part of my life, i hadn't forgotten. Honestly, when i visited them the last time, i cried and was very thankful to them. And they,too had cried!

I mean, what are material things compared to establishment of friendships? I admit some people had borrowed money from me and never pay me back, but i learned my lesson. The lesson? They can never borrow again! They are the ones who have the nerve not to talk to me. And who cares? I never cared for negative people, never at all. And if they don't want my friendship? It is never my loss.

But i am still sad about my good friends who will never be together again, all because of debt. I never asked how much is the amount. I am just more concerned about the friendship. Ah, just one of those things that made me realize that sometimes in this world, material things would value more than anything. I know it is a lie, but it is a lie that is really happening. And if i will say that FRIENDSHIP or LOVE are the most important, i don't know if it is true for some people. It might be true in an idealistic world but never in this worldly, materialistic society!


lareine said...

i agree with you --- when people try to project an image that is beyond their means, it can lead to trouble...and those people who value material things that they can get from you rather than your friendship, well, it's good riddance if they stop talking to you ...

sadly, we are in a society which is becoming more and more materialistic... but if we try to hold on to what is important for us --- love and friendship, and then maybe, the rest of the world would have a better perspective of things...


It would be difficult patching the broken ties between your two good friends because of their pride, I think. No one of them wants to give way to the other. Pride and material obsession would keep people apart because these are the few things in this world which sustains a practical life.

But apart from all these, the possibility of mending broken ties can never be far behind.

Lou said...

This is very sad...hopefully someday things will be settled between your friends.


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evitaineurope said...

Being watchful is ok, but there are times people do really need help, and if you have money to spare, why not? so long as you are not being treated like a fool milking cow. As long as binabayaran ka okey lang. Minsan kasi yung mga indi mo naman talaga malapit na kaibigan ang malakas ang loob manghiram.